Monday; Infusion of Calm

So I've been through another surgery. Apparently I've come through it 100% successful. (In the back of my mind, I have to ask did I really doubt? With a name like P.O.E.M. did I *really* doubt it?). The answer is no, but that doesn't mean I wasn't afraid. And boy was I.

First thanks I must give to my mother. For putting up with me for the two days I turned into a nightmare. And for saving my life many times over. Also thanks to *Victor, Azza, Moggy, D.O, T.T, A.R, A.W, N.E, C.B for thinking of me, calling me, texting me checking in on me. I didn't really think there were that many who cared. I was wrong... Thank you.
*Names are abbreviated or not real names, they know who they are the public world doesn't need to know.

So today I'm trying to plan a return to work, and well looking at things a bit differently it seems than before. I'm not smoking, which was a blessed side effect of the surgery (One I was hoping on as a fail safe since I couldn't quit smoking before the surgery). That brings me to my current living situation. I live with a smoker. It was why I couldn't quite before, I hope fervently I will not succumb once I return home.

It is clear to me changes to my life need to be made. Not just for my health physcially, but also in other ways. Realizations are opportunities for change, and I'm hoping I have the strength to face these changes well. I'm turning 40, there is no better time than now to start living. One step at a time...

"54 Earth. Music by Paul Collier. an Alpha to Delta brainwave entrainment..."