...

I can't ever seem to get enough sleep. Granted I go to bed by or afer midnight usually, but even on nights when I go to bed earlier I can't seem to wake up refreshed. I think that has a LOT to do with my emotional instability lately. That and I've been so damn sick. The messed up thing is I can never tell when I'm goin to be sick. I'm ok for the most part and then wham i'm struggling with nausea. This morning for example, I got up late (again) and had to rush around getting ready. All of a sudden I'm fighintg to not get sick too... *sigh*

The holidays are drawing ever closer and I'm spending this first one completely alone. At least before while I spent it alone for the most part, at least Rob was there or I'd go to his families or something. I didn't even decorate because my house has been torn apart on days when I soaped like made for this charity that I've been wanting to do. So I just dont feel the spirit this season.

I've been wanting to pick up Tai Chi and start practicing that. I even bought a DVD and book from Borders on how to, and the local community college has a class even for $79. The problem is my savings is below $500 now and money is getting really tight. I know.. I have the DVD but I'm not sure I'll do it right.

I'm closing one of my Star Wars Galaxies accounts in January. I've been convinced finally to try World Of Warcraft. *sigh* just what I need another online game. Secretly I kept my TSO, having renewed my subscription the very DAY it expired... I just couldn't let it go. SO I will continue to try to find ways to pay for it. I just can't get rid of it... I've tried three times now. If World of Warcraft is good, then I will be dropping Star Wars Galaxies entirely. Man I should just drop online games entirely, and just keep tso. The problem with that is he plays online gmes all the time, and no one plays TSO anymore either.

I'm feeling sad today though I wonder how much of that is tiredness. All the lifting of things in my house, cutting of soap and general busi-ness leaves me tired. I'm so tired in fact that I'm not even going to write a random poem.... how's THAT for tired.

ciao