Sitting, waiting, wishing...

JACK JOHNSON LYRICS"Sitting, Waiting, Wishing"Now I was sitting waiting wishingThat you believed in superstitionsThen maybe you'd see the signsBut Lord knows that this world is cruelAnd I ain't the Lord, no I'm just a foolLearning loving somebody don't make them love youMust I always be waiting waiting on you?Must I always be playing playing your fool?I sing ya songs I dance a danceI gave ya friends all a chancePutting up with them wasn't worth never having youAnd maybe you been through this beforeBut its my first timeSo please ignoreThe next few lines cause they're directed at youI cant always be waiting waiting on youI cant always be playing playing your foolI keep playing your partBut its not my sceneWont this plot not twist?I've had enough mystery.Keep building me up, then shooting me downWell im already downJust wait a minuteJust sitting waitingJust wait a minuteJust sitting waitingWell if I was in your positionId put down all my ammunitionI'd wondered why'd it taken me so longBut Lord knows that I'm not youAnd If I was I wouldn't be so cruelCause waiting on love ain't so easy to doMust I always be waiting waiting on you?Must I always be playing playing your fool?No I cant always be waiting waiting on youI cant always be playing playing your fool, foool


Those are such perfect lyrics.  Such a good definite example of where I am right now… sitting, waiting, wishing.  

Anyway, it’s been a week since I wrote.  Everyday I want to write, but I feel so lame sometimes always writing about love or my lack thereof.  But there are so many things I want to write about but I just get overwhelmed.  

On the good news is that Crony hasn’t been in since Wednesday as she’s been on vacation.  She comes back Monday though * sigh *.  Oh well three days is better than none (  

I watched Batman Begins yesterday and WOW…. AWESOME movie.  Then I watched Shall We Dance with Richard Gere and J.lo.  Such a good movie.  I’m such a sap.  In my old age, I love to watch films and dream of days when I looked good and had the potential to have dreams like that.  

Sometimes I feel the urge to write, but I don’t exert it.  Like last night I sat in bed and spoke aloud an entire paragraph trying desperately to commit it to memory… because I was so tired I didn’t want to get up to write it.  This morning I’m left with the memory of that paragraph.  It goes something like this:”Darkness descended upon the world as it were, not fast like the speeding bullet but slowly like the lovers embrace.  First it embraced the sky allowing only the faint twinkle of the brightest stars to show through it’s onyx walls, then it draped itself luxuriously over the streetlights and homes of the world as if to say “sleep now…” As the darkness covered all, it crept towards the path behind the beach homes with their bright lights.  Shying away from the warmth these lights represented, it seeped around the structures and behind them almost as if the darkness itself was a tangible…  The path behind these homes led to a slope leading downward and away to the ocean.   Marked only by many years of footsteps some running others walking in their haste to the beach, the path now stood quiet, the wind tickling the blades of grass as it rustled through.  Inside the beach homes families gathered for comfort in the light while outside the deepening shadows held their mysteries…  The wind continued to ripple through the landscape as the grass turned to sand shifting with each push of the wind.  Finally the path ended in the soft sand of the beach that stretched for miles.  The water pounded the beach relentlessly white foamy crests seeking purchase on the land as if to conquer it over and over again.  A few steps straight ahead from the beach at this point would take one straight to the rickety pier.  

The caramel color of the paint had long ago faded to it’s grayish hue over time, and the strength in the boards and planks had ceased to exist long ago.  It was for this reason a sign secured by a chain had closed off the entrance of the long pier, in the hopes of keeping people safe.  Still, teenagers in some mock initiation daring each other to test their fears gained entrance and had their way with the night running and jumping off the pier into the waters as a show of strength when time and lack of police patrols permitted.  Tonight however, only the sound of the sea lapping at the wood structure and the silence of the full moon gazing down on the world, touched this beach of darkened tranquility.  

Well, that and the feet of the angel standing on the edge of the pier, looking down into the water.  

Standing so still that she might have been mistaken for a statue save for her hair that flowed in the wind as it picked up speed nearer the water, not a single limb on her moved.  Wings of white tucked under her hair were only visible when the wind picked up momentum moving her incredibly long hair revealing her true form.  She wore a dress of soft yellow, almost gold in the shimmering light of the moon.  On her porcelain doll like form, a headband of gold with a crescent moon adorned her head.  Her appearance while human was quite ethereal. She wore the clothes of a human, but her eyes alone gave her away.  Gazing down at the water, they shone a birght fiery crystal white.  Tears that fell from those precious eyes were like mini beacons of light suspended in time before they disappeared into the water shimmering for a second before turning to the molecular form of basic water.  Her hands hung limply at her side and as she stood oblivious to the winds continuing to gain speed she spoke in French, her soft whispers carried off in the oncoming storm…

Voici mon secret. Il est très simple : on ne voit bien qu'avec le coeur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.
(It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; What is essential is invisible to the eye.)


Anyway, so that’s what I was working on in my mind… I’ll post it on utopia skye, but anyone who doesn’t visti there but reads here, let me know if this is worth anything.

See ya