The truth about the post...

I know I promised a personal post. I know I promised myself I would write it. And I started to… I really did.

For the most part this blog has been my place to post my thoughts and I have done so with some very personal things. I have boldly stepped into the realm of public display of my life and done so with very little fear for the most part.

But this one is just too personal, at least right now. Suffice to say it’s an exercise in putting my past demons to rest and wrestling with current issues. And I think the past should be put to rest, and the things thought of and concluded, but privately. So while I will not share this with you all, I hope you’ll forgive me, but respect my decision.

~*~

In other news, life has suddenly become very busy. I’ve been offline more than on and it’s nice for a change. There are so many things I could write about. Indeed many times throughout the week I’ve thought, “Oh! There’s a blog post right there!” But when I sit in front of the machine despite having some inspiration, more often than not the page stays white, empty, and the cursor blinks at me begging me to type… but I am without words.

As a nearly final update in the saga of the cancer that appeared in my life months ago, I am finally returning back to the office on March 12th. I’m sure most of you know how I feel about that. Prospects for a new position are dim right now and my motivation is lacking too.

Can I just say right now, that I hate menopause? I HATE it. I’ve tried to learn to live with it, let it share my space but I can’t stand it. The sweats, the mood swings, the fears, the changes. I continually have to come to grips with it and more often than not, I take with just barely quiet resignation that I just wont be rid of it for many years. But while I take it, it doesn’t mean I have to like it. In fact, to reiterate…I HATE it.

Blah blah blah. I’ll stop now. I’ll be back soon.

***EDIT***
Tell me the hairs don't stand up on your neck when you read my horoscope from yesterday. (And before you blast me with the "validity" of horoscopes etc, realize i don't USUALLY give them much weight... but just read, and you'll see why this freaked me out...)

Virgo (Aug. 23 - Sept. 22)
Although you might feel hung up on matters at work or even to do with your health, these problems will pass. They might have occurred last August, and they will come to a head again in June/July. But after that, they'll be gone for 36 years. Courage!

Date of Diagnosis: August 28, 2006
Next post Op Appointment: July 2007