Unfriend...

We've all done it.  We've all been careless with our words because we were hurting.  Sometimes we maybe didn't even have control over it.  It hurts worst when you were on the precipice of trusting someone.  Sure, some may say "better to know now" but sometimes the opening of the door is almost as hard as stepping through.  Just the fact that the door was opened was trust enough, and when hurt makes people act mean it hurts even at the beginning.

Anger is a healthy emotion.  Our world tells us to stifle it.  We're so PC that we have lost touch with the reality of our feelings.  Anger burns bright and if tended to right away burns quickly like a match. Once expressed it fizzles and has no spark left and cannot burn again without external sources.

I recently trusted someone.  I let them inside.  I did (if I'm being honest with myself) have a thought or two about the longevity... but I ignored it.  Recently despite being honorable and honest at all times, the dynamic ended.  And since then words have been bantered about.  They've been cold, and directed with precision at me.

I was sad for a brief period of time, then I got angry.  How dare you say these things?  How dare you be sanctimonious and play the victim when there was no WRONG done.

Hurt sucks, I get it.  But...

Once that match of anger fizzled out, I saw things more clearly.  I saw that I simply had a choice... so I choose not to bow down to hurtful words.  I choose not to keep that connection and so I let it go. Because the hurt that is being expressed is not mine.  I am not hurt.  I am sad and disappointed for lost possibilities; but I am not hurt.

Perhaps in time the hurt that is perceived can be released by this person and they can find joy.  But in my choices I've chosen also to not be a part of that life and so I'll never know.  But I can send wishes and good intentions.  Because they need it, and because it's right.

And because I deserve better.