My dentist gave me a vibrator! o_O

Well now that I have your attention :P

I’m tired today *bleh*.  I decided late last night to start the project of cleaning off my old machine and getting it ready for my mom’s DSL.  The problem is I must be an absolute IDIOT when it comes to networking.  I even called a friend to help me.  I know I’m not completely inept here… I mean I do a fair good job, even if it is damage that I do, it’s something :P  But for the life of me *I* couldn’t figure it out and neither could Mr. Serenader.  That’s bad… Mr. Serenader does this for a living.  I didn’t realize I was scared until he couldn’t figure it out.  

So then at this point it’s after midnight, and I have to be up early but I thought what the hell I’ll try once more.  Wouldn’t you know it, IT WORKED.  This has forever been the problem with my network.  The 3 maybe 4 times I’ve had to connect my pc’s to each other, the only way I’ve succeeded is by luck.  I did the EXACT same things that Mr. Serenader and I did together but somehow it worked.  Maybe the Computer God up in the Matrix took pity on me.  Either that or he knew I would be hella pissed if I didn’t figure it out and well you know “Hell hath no fury like a woman…” wait, wrong quote: P  Well I’m tired :P

Anyway after magically performing a miracle, I then started the process of copying files over from the old machine to the new.  I wont bore you with the mundane details of this, but it was well… boring lol.  Then I had to move things around.  All in all it took a total of 3+ hours to do it all and get this machine ready for my mother.  You HAVE to know that just by this dedication alone should tell you just how much I do not wish to be there Saturday for any more time than is ABSOLUTELY necessary.

This brings me to my next point.  Being at my mothers… I love my mom, don’t get me wrong.  Sure we may fight like cats and dogs, but she’s my mother.  Without her I would be nothing.  But DAMN if I can’t stand her smoking!  Being there is an assault on my health, my senses, and it just makes me ill.  I’m hoping that my efforts last night will make it so easy to install her DSL and move stuff that I only have to be there an hour or so.

I still after that, have to come home and back up MY pc’s and do my taxes *bleh*.  

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Interesting enough when I was moving the archives from yahoo messenger (yes I save ALL messages folks).  I came across some very interesting ones.  Some very funny ones even, and some VERY touching ones.  I saw all the yahoo messages I used to send to my entire yahoo list when I said goodnight to over 200 people each night.  I saw the jokes I shared with people or just the crazy moments we had goofing off in yahoo or yahoo draw or whatever.  I also saw the last message I got from Jessee.  It was received 6-9-04, four days before she passed and it was simply… a hug.  

That single message made me literally stop what I was doing and just stare for a moment.  Sometimes we’re struck with meaning so profound that our mind can’t seem to grasp it.  Elusive like the end of the rainbow may be, meaning and purpose behind some simple icons continues to elude me at times, but it ALWAYS moves me.

I was determined to save every single one of the archived messages I had.  These included messages from friends past, friends who are no longer friends, people who’ve moved on in life etc.  I cherish every one of them.  Painful, sad, happy, or just sentimental, they are a part of who I am, what I’ve experienced and until I can no longer save them… I will cherish them.

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Oh yes, I promised you all a “SEXPERIENCE” post didn’t I?  lol.  Well last night for some unknown reason (before my escapade on the pc networking trip to hell), I went on air.  Soon enough after some time, folks tuned in.  It was great.  I had a few new listeners and a few returning listeners.  Being on air last night reminded me of the fun that can be had when you just have FUN.  Throughout the course of the night we had a few random songs played (Yea, Crazy’s coming out! Lol) and a few ones sung.  “I love myself….” Heh.  It was great.

Then at some point when I realized I hadn’t eaten, I tried to open a jar of pickles.  I was live.  The series of grunts and straining noises that I made were enough to have my yahoo freaking out from people “OMG what ARE you doing!?”.  What do you think I’m doing dear?  I’m trying to get fulfillment…in hunger :P  The funniest bit was of course the releasing sigh when the lid finally came undone and the resulting pleasant moaning as I massaged my nearly broken hand.  Damn those food companies for putting lids on so tight!

I’m glad you all enjoyed my sexperience with pickles.  I’m always happy to be of…service ;)

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Oh you want to know about the dentist who gave me a vibrator eh?  Well trust me it’s nothing as sexy as you may think.  But when I went to the dentist for the first time in some time for a cleaning a few weeks back, they recommended I use an electronic toothbrush.  I love my dentist but I’m sure the spiffs he gets for selling those toothbrushes far outweigh the total advantage of me having an electric toothbrush.  Lol.  Anyway I get the toothbrush home and figure out how to put the batteries in with no problem.  Mr. Uber and I are having a conversation on the phone when all of a sudden as I’m trying to replace the cap for the batteries, I pressed the on knob (It really is like a knob lol not like a switch) and OMG the toothbrush came to life.  Mr. Uber was like “Do you uh need me to let you go so you can…” and here words failed even him.  Mr. Uber the king of perversion as he is affectionately named by many who know him, thought I needed some private time to… get acquainted with myself lol.  

I thought that was hilarious and every morning bleary eyed as I hit the KNOB to practice the fine art of teeth brushing, I can’t help but chuckle about my dentist approved vibrating electric toothbrush!  

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I’ve promised to post some of the funny responses I get to my ad.  I had debated about that feeling bad because believe it or not it is hard to reach out to a total stranger and bare your soul in one email just hoping to get a foot in the door.  I’m totally sympathetic to that, and I thought how would I Feel if I saw *MY* email even devoid of personal information posted on someone’s blog as a horrible response to an ad?  Well I would feel awful.  In light of that, I am going to break my promise and not post those responses.  I will however as I see fit take snippets or lines from the worst of them and post them as a guide for anyone utilizing online ads as to what *NOT* to say.

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No work rant today even though both crony and s were here RIGHT after I got here *sigh*.  No fun Friday for me ;)  Must get back to my filing now.  I figure if I file a letter of the alphabet at a time, I might even be able to look busy all day! WOOHOO!  Go me!

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Random Poetry
Yea, so I had one but it sucked so bad I burned it :P


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WELL WISHES! I’m glad you like this section *smile*

Today I do not single anyone out, I just send out mass doses of hugs, love, muse dust, or whatever you need to feel happy, healthy, sane, and creative.  

And remember:

I'm real easy to live with once you lesser people learn to worship me.
by Rhianna
(I like this girl, she knows my motto!!)